Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Brain Soup du Jour: Confessional Stew

Sometimes it's just waaaaaaaay too much trouble to speak--naturally, that's when everyone I know wants to talk to me--and I can't even bring myself to part my lips and instead answer everyone in grunts and grumbles.


Sometimes I pretend to be interested in something when in truth I couldn't care less.


Sometimes I worry that pretending like that makes me a really bad person.


Sometimes I hate the fact that my brain forces me to be honest with myself, when it would be so much easier (and more fun!) to be delusional suffer a little self-delusion from time to time.


Sometimes I burst into tears for no apparent reason.


Sometimes I think I've answered an email, then two months (or so) passes before I realize that I really didn't answer it after all, except in my head.

**Speaking of which, when is it really too late to answer an email?? Because I might still be in the grace period. But I doubt it.


Sometimes I really, really, really want to tell everyone what they're doing wrong in their lives, because that gives me a...rationalization...as to why I can leave my own untended.


Sometimes I really, really, really want to tell everyone what they're doing wrong in their lives, just because I know everything anyways and people should just do us all a favor and take my advice.


Sometimes I'm facetious. (NO! Really?)


Sometimes I eat the whole pint of Ben & Jerry's in one sitting.


I believe...

...in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days.

...that just because you can say whatever you want, doesn't necessarily mean that you should.

...that sometimes people get so caught up in fighting for their rights and civil liberties that they forget how to use them.

...creating 'designer babies' in a lab is morally wrong and should be punishable by life imprisonment.

...that my friends are the best ones of all. (yeah, that means you)

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