Thursday, December 01, 2005

It's beginning to sound a lot like Christmas...

How do I know the holiday season is upon us?
This song tells me so.

C'mon fellow OkieLanders, sing with me now. I know you know the words.
I'll start, you finish:

Jewelry is the gift to give
'Cause it's the gift that'll live and live!
So give the gift you know can't fail
From B.C. Clarke's anniversary saaaaaaale...

You remember one of the last scenes in the movie Pretty Woman, where Julia has her hair in a ponytail or clip or something? Then Richard Gere shows up and she takes the clip out and her hair falls into perfect bouncing curls.
No lines or frizzies from the ponytail.

Yeah, that never happens to me.

As it is Flashback Thursday and our very own Blazers CHL Hockey Team is playing the Ft. Worth Brahmas tomorrow night, I thought I'd re-post what happened the last time I witnessed these two teams clash...I actually went to Ft. Worth to watch the game.
Here you go.

Entitled: "If I'd have had a sharp stick, I'd've put out my own eyes"

From the Daily Bitch Sports Page...
Okay, so I went to Ft. Worth yesterday with my sister, to catch some CHL action.
Got our asses handed to us on a platter. (Ach, Blazers, what were you thinking?!
A perfectly lackluster performance, until the last five minutes of the game. With 2 goals scored in quick succession, the Blazers finally tied the score at 4 to 4.
Thus began the overtime...with no goals scored by either side.
Then...the bane of their existence...the SHOOT OUT.
The Blazers are not known for their capabilities in this particular area. *sigh*
Boyd Ballard (btw, thanks for the tickets, Boyd, even though I'm going to diss you a little bit) evidently does not see the puck well, since they continued to zip by him.
So when the final Brahma shot the puck...Boyd just watched it right into the goal.
Way to go, Boyd.

But as much as I love (most of) the Great State of Texas (and many of the people who reside there), there were some seriously disturbing events.
Apparently, it is customary for some of the Brahma fans to celebrate a goal in a rather unusual manner~~they take their shirts off and swing them around their heads.

I offer a few tips, or guidelines, to make this event more pleasurable (if that is even a possibility) for the rest of us:

1. If you're over, say, NOT take your shirt off.
2. If your waist size is more than, again I'll say 40 (inches) NOT take your shirt off.
3. If you are a candidate for the "man-bra" NOT take your shirt off.
4. If you've got more hair than a grizzly NOT take your shirt off.
5. If your back is as hairy than your front, if it looks like you're wearing a sweater even when you're NOT take your shirt off.
6. Ladies, if you have boobies that are hovering somewhere near your knees, even with a support NOT take your shirt off.
7. Ladies, if you've forgotten to shave your NOT take your shirt off.

Folks, this is a family show. I feel permanently scarred, and in need of serious therapy. The images are burned into my brain~~I had nightmares. *shudder*

Doctors, I hope you can fit me in for an emergency session today.

I at least hope WE win this time.
And the rules still stand, people. Be warned.
Post a Comment