Fan Expo Dallas: A tl;dr Mostly Photographic Essay

I love getting away from work and kids once or twice a year, but you know how hard it is to say goodbye to these precious little children of mine:

We said our sad farewells as I dropped them off in some parking lot in Texas - but I knew their dad would find them soon because I texted him the name of the store.

Time to go meet up with Nicole and snuggle some fresh kitties!

AAAAND WE'RE OFF! Here we are in our Shiny (Firefly) shirts, ready to conquer the Expo!

The Fan Expo was a little different from Comic Con - also MUCH larger.  There were so many panels and QandA sessions, mostly more pop-culture centered than just comics and Dr. Who and Anime. It was very overwhelming and over-peopley for me.
Luckily Nicole had her Rainbow Claws Paws to keep me safe and sane. RAWR.

We tried to stealth-ninja some photos of Stan Lee, but as you can see we were not successful. He was a tiny man surrounded by some enormous bulky dudes, and he even had people on the lookout for ninja-photographers like us.

Those damn people behind Nicole were DELIBERATELY blocking our Stan-view.

Rob Schneider, on the other hand...

Well, he didn't exactly have prime space. We could just sort of walk up and take a photo through the curtain and no one noticed. Or cared. HAHAHA IN YOUR FACE $80 PHOTO OP and AUTOGRAPH! #FreePhotoIsFree

So we made it to the John Cusack panel and a guy came out to warm up the crowd...sort of the Q and A panel "fluffer," if you will.
The first time he came out he said NO VIDEOS.
WHAAAAAAAAAAA? Even Shatner let us take videos at ComicCon! WTF DUDE.

The second time he came out he said again, NO VIDEOS. And in fact NO PICTURES AT ALL. "Let's pretend it's really the 80s and there are no cell phones." Um dude, there were still cameras in the 80s.

BUT RULES IS RULES, so we put our cameras and cell phones away. I am nothing if not a strict rule-follower. So you will DEFINITELY NOT be seeing any photos of John Cusack from the Dallas Fan Expo here.

No way, no how.

#Forbidden.

It was weird - I wish you could see the back of his head. At first I thought he had on one of those Sherlocky-style deerstalkers with a brim on the front and the back. Then Nicole pointed out that it ACTUALLY looked like a strange distinct flap of hair, as though when he put on his hat it shoved a toupee out of the way and was hanging on the back of his head. As they do sometimes. #MrTudball (about 5 people will get that)
 (OH! And here's me taking a selfie with everyone in the Cusack QandA)

After that we decided to wander and shop and see what we could see.
Security seemed pretty tight. At least they generally hit what they're shooting at.
Also? PINK R2 UNIT. (PS I have not seen new Star Wars yet)

Unlike these guys - no one was really worried about them even though their guns were probably real and fully loaded.

Cool Guy thinks he is Cool. With Sailor Moon and Sailor Scouts.

DON'T QUOTE ME ON THIS: but I *think* this might be happening in TULSA OK! Woo WHO! [see what I did there?]

I think Red Flash needs a cup or at least a jockstrap. And maybe to lay off the bacon cheeseburgers for a minute or get a...less fitted super suit. He looks a little bored with Other Flash's shenanigans.
SERIOUSLY. DUDE. A CUP.

Weirdly (or perhaps not so weird), Nicole and I always end up in cemeteries when we're together.
Note the absence of Weeping Angels; they're all inside the Expo. This was a cemetery in THE MIDDLE OF THE CONVENTION CENTER. What's that about?

I think this one was fresh and just waiting for someone to dig a hole. The mortuary makeup artist did an awesome job, right? So lifelike! Although she was starting to smell a bit ripe.

OH! Here are they are!
REMEMBER: DON'T...

BLINK.

My new boyfriend and newest favorite Superhero ever, #Deadpool. Also best movie ever...or at least in the last like 10 or 15 years. Also that is my Tardis mystery box, he was protecting it from villains for me because HE IS FUCKING AWESOME LIKE THAT AND SHIT.
#Unicorn #Shoop #Bananas

Here is Godzilla. He looks lonely. :(

Here is Godzilla about to eat some children. I support that.

Sassy Star Wars. #SaberEnvy

We stopped at one booth to check out some t-shirts and the guy said, "Here's the Question of the Day."
We thought he was going to quiz us on Firefly. (PS If you are not a Browncoat, you might as well skip the rest of this little section because you will be all HUH? *coffLISAcoff*)

"How do Reavers clean their harpoons? THEY RUN THEM THROUGH THE WASH."

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
We did not buy anything from that guy. #RIPWash #WeLoveWash #LeafUponTheWind

Prisoner Jayne is sad. #JayneCobb "Time for some thrilling heroics."

We noticed that crazy old Vigo The Carpathian up to his same tricks! Such a lech!

He tried to suck me in but I am waaaay too much woman for him.

Then Nicole got us one of the most awesome things ever - MYSTERY BOXES.
We got a Tardis lunchbox full of trading cards!
A Breaking Bad doll!
Wristbands and lanyards and popheads!
Weeping Angel tote bag! And MORE!
SO. MUCH. FUN.

Also I am permanently changing my political affiliation for good and forever.

WTF with Robin's legs? Looks like he put his tights on backward. But I do like the Adam West Batman. KAPOW! ZOK! OUCH! BAM!
ChubbyBatman is Chubby.
Also? WHERE IS YOUR OTHER HAND, ROBIN?

By late afternoon, we were WIPED OUT. Nicole's skin was so dry I had to buy her a keg of moisturizer. Also she could stand to eat a t-bone and baked pertater once in awhile, amirite?
#DrWho #Cassandra

To cap off a fantastic day, we had a fun evening when we got to have dinner with one of my first blogging friends since around... what? 2004 or 05? The beautiful and smart and sweet Megan and her husband. ♥♥♥♥

Little did we know that there was ANOTHER (you totally heard a Yoda voice in your head just now)...another Con in town. It was A-Kon (not THAT Akon although how awesome would that have been??). Much like izumiCon in OKC, this is focused mostly on Anime, Japanime, and Manga. My daughter would've loved it, so guess where we'll she'll likely be next year.
ANYWAY.
The point of THAT tidbit of information is that one of my very favorite authors of all time, Taylor Stevens, was there with her family and OMG SQUUEEEE WE GOT TO MEET HER FOR A DRINK and spent a fantastic chunk of time in her company. I was happy (and UNshocked) to find that she is as warm and lovely and real in person as she is online.

***Quick #FANGIRL #PLUG: If you like strong, badass female lead characters with Jack Reacher-type lifestyle and a Mitch Rapp skill-set; if you like action and thrillers, GO. BUY. HER. BOOKS. The main character: sort of an heroic anti-hero by the name of Vanessa Michael Munroe, is dysfunctional, troubled, and bad to the fuckin' bone. YOU WILL LOVE HER. Get this one first - The Informationist - and just read 'em down the line. YOU ARE WELCOME***

All in all, one of the best weekends ever invented.

I feel so spoiled. ♥
You wish you were in my weekend.