It's complicated.

Sometimes how much I laugh is directly proportional to how hard the day is.
Sometimes the more wise-ass I get is directly related to my rising level of frustration/anger.

Sometimes the funnier people think I am is when I'm hurting the most.
Sometimes when I'm nice(-ish), it's because I've said or thought or done something horrible or mean.

Sometimes the brighter the smile, the closer the tears.
Sometimes I barely want to be your friend anymore but I can't stand the thought of you not being there.

Sometimes the more contrary and stubborn I seem, the more I really want to just give in and go along.
Sometimes the more I share, the more I want to hide from you.

Sometimes when I'm kidding, I'm really not. Much.
Sometimes I take myself way too seriously. And sometimes not seriously enough.

Sometimes the more polite I am, the less I actually like you.
Sometimes the more concerned I seem, the less I care.

Sometimes I feel like I'm being melodramatic (like now), which makes me feel awkward and embarrassed.
Sometimes (like now), I just want a big bear hug. (but not by a real bear)(maybe a panda)(or a koala. yes, a koala)

Sometimes I have no clue what to do next.
Sometimes I wonder what you would do.