Wednesday, July 04, 2007

SBC Survivor Journal--Day ????

"Why do you play stupid?"
"Because it's good cover for when I am stupid."

Dear Diary,

I've heard it being whispered around (behind my back, the dirty cowards) that I'm going crazy. The bumblebee said it to the coconut.


But some of these people are starting to really piss me that rat bastard Mango.
Yeah, right, talk about crazy! He prances around with a conch shell pressed to his ear, telling us to shut up because he's talking on his fancy new iPhone.
(Then why doesn't he call for HELP, the jackass!)
Plus he made some disparaging remarks about Oklahomans...perhaps he forgot that THREE of the girls on this island (including myself) are Okies and we could totally beat the shit out of him and grind his bones to make our bread.



Oh, sorry, where was I?
Oh yeah, watermelons.
The next task is some ritualistic watermelon carving...I think Rose has found a stash of watermelons and she's trying to hide them under her shirt--she says that she's not hiding anything, her boobs just grew bigger due to the fresh air and saltwater.
If that's what it takes, how come mine aren't any bigger?

Speaking of saltwater, some of these people could benefit from a dip in the ocean, if you get what I mean. They're getting a little...ripe. *gag* It's what I imagine it would smell like if I visited a cave full of Sasquatch(es?).

And I'm a little bit pissed at Jeckles for voting off Mike in the last round, because he was THE ONLY SINGLE MAN here on this godforsaken island. I was planning to use him for sex. And, you know, to carry the heavy stuff. And do my tasks for me. Now THAT'S screwed. Thanks a heap.

Utopia's on a rampage about something or other--I hear the words 'sneak' and 'thief' and 'bagels' a lot...I've learned to tune her out & watch my back at the same time. Yummy's been quiet...TOO quiet. I find that frightening on many levels.

Tammy and Nat still seem to be handling things okay, but I don't trust them. They have sly, sneaky faces sometimes. I'm going to have to watch out for them.

I almost forgot about Chad, because he's been so quiet and unmoving in his little trench thingy. He might possibly be dead (judging from the smell), but I'm sure as hell not going to go over there and check.

Now I have to go tail Rose to see where those watermelons are coming from...

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