Dear Diary,
Mere words cannot convey the sheer suckage of this island.
I think Utopia ate one of her turtles...raw. *glurg*
I hurt my back, but I found that lying on the beach in the hot sun and sand makes it feel so much better, even though I've heard the others whispering about me just being lazy.
So, anyway, I finally was able to steal one of Rose's watermelons, which I desperately needed to complete this task...which was to carve a watermelon like you would carve a Halloween pumpkin, only it should have something to do with Shitty Blog Survivor.
I've never even carved a pumpkin.
And here on the island, tools (other than seashells) are scarce.
Speaking of seashells, the conch shell that Mango was pretending to use as an iPhone got broken when he dropped it on a tree stump.
He screamed something unintelligible as he brandished the broken pieces of shell at us, and we all had a good hearty laugh the moment his back was turned.
Anyway anyway anyway...I found an old rusty screwdriver (true story!) and a sharp piece of shell and set about attempting to carve my stolen watermelon...
Okay, so I couldn't figure out how to set the date on this cheap-ass camera.
After I eat all the watermelon, I plan to wear this at night & sneak up on the others, jumping out at them from behind trees and such in hopes that I can make someone pee their pants. Because cool.
PLUS I found THIS:
Evidently Mango's been trying to fit in a little more closely with cannibals...I can only hope he gets eaten up soon.
And a final message for Jeckles:
Arrgh, how am I ever going to continue to survive on this island??
Help me. Please, help me.
Love,
Me
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