Friday, May 19, 2006

Get out. Stay out.

Dear Lauren and/or Casse,
STOP SNOOPING AROUND. Um, seriously, I can see that you spent 35 minutes here today WHILE YOU WERE ON THE CLOCK.
I'm totally docking your pay.
Go away, because chances are that I will be talking about you at some point and then you'll get your little feelings hurt & stuff.
Don't say you weren't warned.
Duh, I've got the IP address. I work there too.
And stay the hell off my computer, you know I don't like people messing with my stuff when I'm not there.
NO TOUCHY.
NO COME HERE.
NOT SAFE FOR FAMILY.
Thank you.
Buh bye.


on a happier note...
I got to have lunch (mmmmmmm...Chinese food!) with the lovely Rose today. We chattered like magpies for two hours and I must say she is a delight!
If you don't read her blog, you should. She makes me laugh.
Thanks, Rose! It was ever so much fun! I look forward to the next time. :)

I think I say this every time I get a chance to meet one of my online friends, but hey, it's still true:
"The nice thing about meeting other bloggers is that there is always someone something to talk about. Always."


I have so much that I want to say...it is logjammed in my mind.
It is so tightly packed that I can't even get in there to sort out what is appropriate to post and what should be kept to myself.

So I stole this MEME from one of my all time favoritest funniest ladies, Golfwidow, in hopes that it would help me unjam.
(perhaps you can tell by her "Ministry Of Silly Walks" why I adore her)

List ten things you want to say to people but know you never will.
Don't say who they are, don't confirm or deny any 'comment speculation', and use people only once.

(no exceptions, so please don't ask)


1. I could say "Thank You" one hundred times a day for the rest of my life and still not adequately convey the gratitude I feel for you.

2. My admiration for your amazing talent and brilliance is so immense that it even squeezes out the envy.

3. You play the martyr so often and so well that it has become the norm. And seriously, if you look up "vanity" in the dictionary, you'll see one of the 7 bazillion pictures a picture of yourself.

4. We get it. You're super. You're the smartest of everyone. Can we move on now? (and P.S. you're not as cool as you think you are. I mean it.)

5. I'm tired of redrawing the boundaries of friendship; perhaps you should learn to watch where you step.

6. I don't love you anymore.

7. I am humbled by your faith and trust in me. I am relieved at your patience with me. I am puzzled at your love for me. Don't be blinded by me.

8. You always know the right thing to say at just the right time~~for that and so much more I love you.

9. Stop that freaking whining. Not everything is about you. Not even half of everything. Get over yourself.

10. YOU are the reason someone wrote this line: "Of course you have a sense of humor. Everyone thinks they do, even people who don't." (Barney Coopersmith, My Blue Heaven)


This was actually more difficult for me than I had originally supposed...some of the remarks I wanted to make were so pointed that their subjects seemed glaringly obvious.
Then I remembered that some people are so self-UNaware that I could've used their initials in the post and they still wouldn't get it.

And then I remembered that some people (like me, for instance) are so paranoid that they will worry that most of the remarks are directed at them.

And then I remembered that I have just enough of a mean streak to be amused at the thought of who would try to attribute which remarks to themselves.
Please forgive me for that, I've a touch of schadenfreude today.
Stand back, it may be contagious.


That is all.
Have a day.
(**I should add that some of the remarks are directed at "real life" friends & family)
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