Friday, December 16, 2005

Monty's Utterly Wonderful Day(s)

**UPDATE: Please visit my new tenant, Plaid Toaster. I love her already. Her kids are weird too. AND, like me, has no friends because she's too lazy to make the commitment.
Go see her and tell her the landlord sent you. She'll be in her underwear. Probably.

but first...
Man, I knew there was a reason I love you guys~~we've had some wonderful times, haven't we? ;)
Dave, this is JUST FOR YOU.

Our Feature Presentation...
Upon further reflection, it occurs to me that what is fantastic and exciting to me may only be a stop in Ho-Hum, Yawnsville to you.

So, sorry if I got your hopes all up & stuff. ;)

Okay, I got home from my (half-day) of work on Thursday (which is my Friday~~two good reasons for a happy day right there!)

In addition to a couple more lovely cards (and a very naughty XXX one, thank you Jules), there was a little package.
At first glance I assumed it was something the Sperm Donor had sent to the kids for Christmas.

It wasn't.

It was FOR ME.
And it was from an online friend...someone I never, ever expected to get a gift from. He's such a doll.

AND he picked the A-PLUS-Number-One-Highest-Priority thing on my wishlist (see the little Wishes & Dreams button over there on the right-hand sidebar?).

It was THIS:

You may remember I told you that I went to one of the concerts there in Austin Texas, May 2000. You may also remember that I have Russell Crowe's sweat on my bandana.
I'm actually saving that for the DNA so that someday I can have him cloned for my own personal pleasure.
AND you may further remember that I actually passed a few words with (totally hot, sexy, badder-than-bad-boy) Russell himself.

This, my friends, is the best gift ever.
I get to re-live the concert. Anytime I want.

You know what else?


Wait for it....


Betcher ass.

Swinging my bright red bandana, wiping my face with it, sleeves rolled up, hat on (my friend Tamz made us all little caps with TOFOG on them)...
And there I am.
I realize the pictures aren't very clear, since I took them from the video~~but rest assured it is yrs truly. One day I'll hunt up the pictures I took there & show you.
The dark haired girl in front of me is my friend Goosie (aka Lisa). We had us a time, yes we did.

And my friend Neicie (who, until we met at the concert I had only known as grunthead1), actually got interviewed.

How d'you like me now, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm?

Okay, it all seems a little anti-climactic now...

If that weren't proof enough that I am indeed on Santa's nice list, then listen to this...
As I scurried through the stores yesterday to do all my Christmas shopping, I went into of my greatest weaknesses. I was determined to get what I needed and leave, without buying myself a book.
Man, that was tough.
I got two books for my dad (Nelson DeMille) and for my daugher I got Island of the Blue Dolphins and A Wrinkle In Time.
I was resisting with all my might, but as I walked to the checkout counter I began to feel faint and dizzy. I tried to keep moving, to persevere, but I was getting weaker and weaker.
As I passed the Bargain Books, my willpower completely deserted me and I had to look.
And naturally, picked up a book for myself. Hey, it was on sale, a hardback David Baldacci for 5.99.
This cleared my head immediately.
I resume my walk to the checkout counter, the nice lady rings up my purchases and gives me a total.
I was puzzled, because the total seemed to be off. She must have noticed that I was confused because she picked up the book that I had grabbed for myself and said, "This one's free, hon. We're having a buy-4-get-the-5th-free sale."

I am the luckiest girl in the world.

A little heads-up:
Loose=the opposite of tight.
Lose=the opposite of win. Or find.

I'm just sayin'.
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