Getting personal

My friend Lisa said that I should write something about her during my "one paragraph per day" challenge. I told her I wasn't sure I could come up with a whole paragraph or maybe even a whole sentence past "Lisa sucks". But in order to prevent much whining (like she does whenever she doesn't get her own personal ringtone on my phone), I guess I can tell you that she's probably one of the best people I've ever met - she's generous to a fault and she can be sort of mean and very sarcastic and of course you know I like that in person. If she were an animal, she'd be a bulldog because she does NOT LET (the Guinness*) GO. That can be sort of bad if she's on the wrong track, but mostly it's a very good thing except if she's nagging. Also? She's really pretty and she lets me say rude things to her in texts. She exercises a lot which makes me hate her a little, but she makes up for it by not reminding me that I'm fat and lazy. She's a good houseguest too, except when she makes me fetch her coffee like eleventy-three times per day. But I guess I love her anyway. Mostly.
Don't be jealous because I didn't write about you - she asked, you didn't. Also she is an attention hoor.

*inside joke