no-longer-a-friend, really: "I gave birth to an 8 pound baby, yours was just over a pound. You can't possibly understand the pain I was in. Yours couldn't have hurt that much."
Me: "I had a vaginal birth and a caesarean within an hour of each other. Top that."
no-longer-a-friend, really: "...."
Me: "Plus, what came out was still bigger than anything that ever went in."
That is all.
Have a day.