Monday, November 14, 2005

I am practiced at the art of the non sequitur...

...because rarely am I relevant and even less often do I make sense.
The Pointless Blogger, as Mamacita accidentally called me. I'm thinking of changing my name.

WELCOME WELCOME! This is such a surprise! Had I known that you and Michele were coming I would have picked up the dirty underwear off the floor.
Help yourself to coffee, mugs are in the cabinet to the right of the sink. Please don't eat all the biscotti.


Yesterday I was behind a car and thought of FTS when I saw the bumper sticker
I ♥ Colorado

Anyway, I pulled up to the stop light where I watched the guy shoot the the stoplight.
HAD to be the light, because the only other person around was ME and I was behind him and hadn't done anything to deserve it. Okay, maybe a little tailgating, but that's it.
I thought perhaps he was giving the finger to the lady in the passenger seat, but he was staring straight ahead and aimed it toward the stoplight...

So, why waste a nice, perfectly executed flip-off on a stoplight?
It can't even see you. Plus you don't even get the satisfaction of a reciprocal EFF YOU gesture, horn honk, nasty threats...or even the rare but extremely deadly "DOUBLE BIRD" shot.
What's the point?
I's jes' wondrin'.

I wore my tennis shoes all day yesterday sans socks.
Now my shoes are stinky.

You ever notice that when you loan your car to someone and then get in it for the first time, after spending 30 minutes getting everything readjusted to PRECISELY the way it was start the engine, take off, and it drives funny?

Or is it just because my brother & dad always just drive the shit out of all cars?

Have you ever stirred your coffee with a pen because you didn't have any clean spoons?
Oh....yeah, me neither.
I was just asking.
For research purposes.

I have caught my daughter sneaking around reading....
.....the encyclopedia. Twice.
Heaven only knows how many times she's done that and I haven't caught her.
I certainly hope that you don't think I'm the kind of parent who condones that type of behavior.

Now I have to go wash my donut down with some chocolate cake.
Post a Comment