AKA Monty
AKA Monty
OkieLand
Brain-Soup.Blogspot.Com

41 yr. young single mom. 15-year-old twins, boy & girl. My son is disabled. My life is often amusing / frustrating / ridiculous. I'm fairly neurotic, frequently depressed, often anxious. Come and experience my unqualified mediocrity.

My Personal Philosophy:
Take life with a grain of salt, a dash of pepper, and a shot of tequila.

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"You're like Erma Bombeck, only MEAN."
- Andrew Speno

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- Molly B.

"I keel joo." - Jami R.

Alltop, all the cool kids (and me)


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Tuesday, February 14, 2012

In Honor Of VD, a re-post


Aaah Valentine's Day... a day for laHOvaHERS.
As you head out for (or maybe wrap up) your fancy schmancy red-hot date, let's just take a moment to...
consider the possibilities.
To that end, I offer you a re-post of mine from long ago.

10 Things The Romance Books Don't Tell You How To Handle

1. Skidmarks
2. Morning breath
3. The first time you fart during sex
4. Smelly feet
5. What happens when you fix beans & cornbread for dinner, and then sleep over
6. The first time you have to poo when he/she is at your house.
7. All sorts of body odors in all sorts of places
8. A little something hanging from your nose (or his) when you're on a date.
9. Hairy backs on otherwise perfect-for-you men
10. First Date Food In Your Teeth


YOU. ARE. WELCOME.



Some of you wrote to ask why I didn't haul out the annual birthday post for my kids...well, I had originally decided to re-do the whole thing but when I sat down to write, it kept coming out as more of a post about me, about the struggles our little 3-person family has had, and I didn't want it to be like that.
So next year - it's a biggie, EIGHTEEN! - I will overhaul the post and make it bright and shiny and new.
But thank you for asking. 
And the kids and I thank you for all the birthday wishes yesterday.

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